My miscarriage story
Updated: Apr 3
After having a difficult time with the birth of my baby and severe depression, I was very happy to be pregnant again. To me, this felt like I could do the maternity period all over again as I hardly remember this time with my baby girl.
The first few weeks were exciting. I hardly had any symptoms except for sore breasts. My psychiatrist told me it was ok the keep using the antidepressants for my depression, which was a huge relief. When she told me this, I could enjoy this pregnancy a little more. As I was very insecure, I had an early ultrasound to check if everything was ok. This was planned at 7 weeks of pregnancy. I was very nervous about this appointment as I know it will become more real to me when I see this tiny human growing inside of me. The waiting in the office for the appointment felt a bit weird as we also had a 6-month-old with us. Lucky for us we did not have to wait very long. The ultrasound operator asked us a few questions and we were ready for the ‘real’ work. First, she tried it externally but as the pregnancy was still very early, nothing was detected. She did a second attempt internally. This way the fetus was found quickly. The heartbeat was fast and strong. Again a huge relief for me. It was so special to watch this small clump of cells of about 1cm big. I saw my girl for the first time at 13 weeks of pregnancy. By then everything was already there. Now that I saw this tiny human inside of me. I felt pregnant for real.
About a week after the ultrasound I lost a few drops of brownish blood. This scared me and I immediately called my midwife. She told me this can happen when you cough or sneeze and